We know the warning signs to look for on dates. We know the alarm bells to listen for during an interview. Teachers, of course, have their own identity system of red flags when it comes to parents and families. These red flags are code for âproceed with caution.â Continue to be kind, professional, and warm. But keep emails short. Document extensively. Loop in an administrator if things get hairy.
Does a red flag mean youâll never be able to connect with that family? Of course not. It just means it may take some serious emotional and communication muscle to build trust. (But in the meantime, like we said: Proceed with caution.)
Reddit teachers weighed in with phrases or behaviors that triggered an instant âuh-ohâ reaction to parentsâ comments. Here are their biggest red flags:
âTheyâre your problem during school hours.â
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âMy child would never say/do that.â
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âMy child does not lie to me.â
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âMy kid is misbehaving because theyâre bored.â
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âWe donât use that language at home.â
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The student is pulled out for a lot of vacations and/or family events.
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âI tried searching for you but I couldnât find you on any social media.â
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âHe doesnât have time to do the work for your class. Basketball keeps him so busy!â
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âYou know how it is ⊠heâs just a boy. Boys will be boys!â
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âYour class is just journalism; it doesnât even matter.â
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âYup. Sounds like him.â
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Signing emails as âCEOâ of his own business. Then meeting with me, he starts every sentence with âAs a CEO âŠâ
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âWe arenât really a reading house.â
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A 3rd grader kicked me in the shin and his momâs first reaction was to ask what I did to provoke the behavior.
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When the father of the kid silenced the mother during conferences.
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If they ever refer to themselves as âmama bear.â
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âWe donât do consequences at home.â
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Hereâs one that Iâve heard is a red flag for teachers but didnât make the list:
âIâm a teacher too/used to be a teacher, so âŠâ
Unless that sentence ends with âSo here is a thank-you card with a cash giftâ or âSo let us know if you need anything!â teacher-parents need to proceed with caution too đ